I've been trying to speak with God lately, but without much success. I think I'm not ready yet, that's why.
God was closer when I was just a kid, maybe that was the same for you or maybe you think you don't believe in God and that's fine, 'cause right now it seems like I don't too.
You know, when we were kids the days were longer and the world bigger. Everything was a mystery and that is why I used to believe in God. That made me feel safe because, no matter what, he was looking out for me in the end.
Now I just don't know what to believe. I'm so hurt and angry that I always find an excuse not to search for him properly. I don't want to sit down and meditate because I don't have no time to do that, I got so many things to do and not so much time to do the things I really like.
But then if I stop for a moment I can feel myself praying silently behind all of it, I can feel the hope hidden behind all the rage and sorrow and grief, I can feel myself underneath my skin and that feeling maybe is just the red wine I'm sipping as I write this. I don't know, recently I heard someone say that you should do everything you do for God and I really liked that. I make music because I want people to like me, so I can feel proud of myself...yeah, then someone else said that in the end even Bach will be forgotten, so why am I doing all this? Is that only about my ego?
Maybe I'm praying while I make music, I like that, yeah, I like to think that this has a higher purpose and it's not just my selfish ego. I really like that, but I'm not so sure now, let's see where this is going, you never know.
God was closer when I was younger and I could really feel him.
Now I'm so hurt because I abandoned him, because I abandoned my true self.
November the 1st, 2020
THE TRACK OF THIS MONTH WAS CREATED FROM AN EVENING JAM ON MY IPAD, THE APPS I USED ARE XYNTHESIZR (FOR THE SEQUENCES), THEN SOME DRONING APP (I THINK THE APP IS CALLED DRONEO) WITH A BIT OF BITCRUSHING APPLIED TO IT, THEN I JUST DID SOME POSTPRODUCTION IN ABLETON LIVE 10 AND ADDED SOME MORE EFFECTS AND NOTES HERE AND THERE.
Tim is one of my main inspirations when it comes to electronic music. I love the minimalist approach in this last album from him and it is definitely worth listening to! White Noise from Electronic Toys
Simon is one of my favorite youtube personalities. This album is surprisingly beautiful, ironic and the way sounds were treated inspired deeply. Listen to it with a very good pair of headphones! White Noise from Electronic Toys
I love this album. A beautiful and inspiring work of experimental music made with non-electronic instruments sounding like synthesizers but retaining their mechanicalness in a magic way. White Noise from Electronic Toys
The latest U-Udios release is an electro-acoustic exploration of rhythm and atmosphere featuring Pissed Jeans' drummer Sean McGuinness. Bandcamp New & Notable Mar 24, 2020
More far-out experimental techno from Geo Rip (Protect-U with Dope Body's John Jones) on this all-original mixtape for Trilogy Tapes. Bandcamp New & Notable Nov 26, 2019